CALHOUN HOUR - SURVIVOR

[vivariummods]

At the crack of dawn, presumably, Calhoun gathers everyone in the first floor warehouse to make an announcement. "That's right, it's time for another of my special events!" He seems pretty pleased with himself. "I noticed you lazy, fat test subjects really let yourselves go last round! It's like I don't feed you here or something." "Well, I'm worried about your health, always lazing about and not getting proper exercise. So, I decided to be the change I want to see in the world, and so we're going to do something a littttttttllllllle different this time." "To stop you guys from getting soft from all the fun you're having here, it's time for a little workout." From one of the doors Calhoun never lets anyone go through there's a loud, metallic banging sound repeating, as if something is trying to get out. Calhoun does not seem troubled at all by this. In fact, he seems pretty excited. "The rules are simple, everyone's getting sixty coins to use as they see fit. You'll notice the vending machines on both warehouse floors. Anyone who isn't caught will even get a memory back." But what does that mean? "So go on, survive for 23 hours, I'll even give you a five minute head start. Good luck!" And with that he scurries off. Should people hang around they'll get to witness that same door open five minutes later. From the door comes several figures, human in shape but something is very, very wrong. They seem to be robotic, skeletal humans. At one point they must have had some synthetic skin over them but most of it seems to be melting or ripped off. They don't move very fast, mostly they shamble about until they focus on a target. Better hope it's not you! BASIC INFO ✖ FIRST TEN HOURS ✖ LAST HOURS ✖ POST EVENT MINGLE

Comments

[skyentificmethod]

So, is the point of the game completing the levels? Or just seeing how broken they can get?

[puzzlinglad]

Honestly I think half the battle is finding one that you can complete a level in before it just breaks completely. We never got far enough to find such an elusive game.

[And off to the game selection, with such riveting titles as 'Baby Maker Extreme 3.' A treasure trove.]

[skyentificmethod]

[.........................
She sorts through the likes of 'The Exterminator' (which looked to be sponsored by a local fumigation firm), 'Organ Organ Revolution,' 'Imagine: Clonez,' and 'Halfling Halfpipe,' of which the description was written completely in verse and seemed to be about snowboarding.]

Any of these appealing to you?

[puzzlinglad]

[Maybe they could find a hacked pokemon game or something, that's at least mildly entertaining. Hershel just kind of stares at what they have.]

Appealing is a bit of a strong word to use. [That's like asking what looked good in the cafeteria. He picks up what looks like a rip off of Surgeon Simulator with not anatomically correct models already on the cover art.] Maybe this? I think it's trying to be Operation...

[skyentificmethod]

...The one where you don't wanna touch the sides, right?

Give it a shot, can't be worse than any of these others.

[puzzlinglad]

[Famous last words, Ema. He puts the game in, handing Ema one of the controllers and sitting back. True to form it's absolutely trying to rip of Surgeon Simulator, each of them controlling a hand, only less a weird dysfunctional hand and more the hand of someone who's just been electrocuted and doesn't have full control of any of it's muscles.

Hershel just kind of watches his hand's thumb stretch back at an unnatural angle and sighs.] Ah, yes, this would be the exact experience I was trying to describe.

[skyentificmethod]

[she struggles with it for a while, not just the terribly sluggish controls and seemingly arbitrary rules on what counts as a proper cut and what makes the CG patient shoot literal fountains of blood. the rigging seems shoddy at best, and every so often the thumbnail will stick at a corner of the screen, the rest of the hand stretching unnaturally to the play area. ema tries (and fails) not to go green at the warping]

I don't know if I can do this... Hands shouldn't move like that...

[puzzlinglad]

I don't think anything moves like that. [What good games. He pops it out because yeah forget this. Maybe there's one of those impossible platformers around or something.]