vivarium | CALHOUN HOUR

When characters begin to wake up, instead of finding themselves in the usual warehouse, they will instead find themselves in an a very unfamiliar area. Maybe they'll wake up alone, or maybe they'll wake up with someone else. Either way, the biggest point is that they're in God-knows-where and it's the start of a new Calhoun Hour.

Within seconds later, a familiar voice booms throughout the loud speakers.

"Ahem, testing, testing! Hello, can you all hear me?"

It's, without a doubt, your favourite robotic mouse, Calhoun. As usual, he sounds a cheery as ever.

"Wow, isn't this familiar? It's almost like the first time we've met, you know. Test subject in a new location, maybe alone or maybe with someone else, my charming voice rings throughout the room, trying to drown you all in an elevator. Good times!"

"Well, anyway, welcome to your new Calhoun Hour! You can see that I've taken the liberty to move you all to a more suitable location. You may not know it, with how small your brains are, but you're all stuck in a maze! I've had my fair share of running around in mazes, you know, being a mouse and all, so I want to return to favour to you humans! So, you know the drill: explore, look around, try to escape, blah blah blah, I don't need to explain all this! Just get to it! Who knows, maybe the exit here is an exit out to the real world. I might be generous like that, if you manage to find it. If not, well, I guess you can all starve here!"

He snickers, then pauses. Suddenly, a loud gunshot-like sound rings throughout the speakers, and Calhoun screams again.

"Let's get started!"

BASIC INFO ✖ ESCAPE ✖ POST-EVENT MINGLE ✖ TURN-IN

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Jake just shrugged. Maybe Heiji would attempt fate, maybe he wanted to prove to Jake how fearless he was. Who knows, but... oh, a cell phone. Just staring at it then looking up at Heiji.

"... No." That was literally all Jake was going to say on the matter. NO, BAD HEIJI, STOP THINKING.

He knew it was a bad idea. It was like 99% sure to be a trap. 99.999999%. But...

Cell phone...

Every fiber of Heiji's being literally wanted to go for that cell phone. It had been at least 50 days since he'd had one, and though he didn't remember it, he used to use his all the time. Calling friends... texting... talking about murder...

But though it pained him to admit it, Jake was right. Probably. Probably he was right.

"Ugh, fine. Let's get outta here, then." He tossed the shovel over his shoulder in disgust. It clattered across the top of one of the coffins, shimmying down a slightly ajar lid until, improbably, it did a little flip over the edge of a coffin and smacked one of the prone robots in the face. A robot hand thrust violently out of the pile of coins and grabbed the shovel handle.

"...Seriously?!"

... Way to go, Heiji. Hitting that dead robot in the face woke it up.

Straight out of a horror movie, the robot slowly sat up, creaking all the way. It certainly wasn't as fast as the robots back during the Survivor event, and it was a lot more noisy, but it was... somehow more menacing this way, especially now that it was crawling out of its coffin.

"Great, did you want to deal with another one of these things?"

"Well... no..." said Heiji as the robot creaked its way up over the lip of the coffin and slammed down onto the floor. Maybe it wasn't quite as coordinated as before, either.

He grabbed another shovel. ~~"BUT MAYBE YES."~~

This robot also did not have any fucks left in it, because it decided to stay on the floor and crawl towards them. Understandable when its legs completely trashed. In the background of everyone's minds, a certain song begins to play.

Jake rolled his shoulders (he didn't need some weapon to help him). "Get rid of the head. Should be easy enough for you and your shovel."

Well, that was creepy. Heiji carefully placed the blade of the shovel at the base of the robot's roboty skull, put his foot down on the edge of the spade, and bore down. The robot's head popped off with a brief and frankly rather sad little puff of sparks.

Heiji picked up the robot head. Should he try to take it and scare Alfendi, that was the question.

Well, that was easy. Hmm, would that be the end of it? Stay tuned and find out if Jake tries to steal coins from the coffin now that the robot is dead.

"Keep it. It'd make a good souvenir and prop to have. Could probably scare Hershel with it."

Do it, Jake. You know you want to.

"You kiddin'? It'd give him a heart attack. I ain't gonna live with that blood on my hands." He grinned. "Maybe I'll use it to mess with Alfendi. I think he's feelin' a little down, what with not bein' able to order delivery."

Oh, you bet he would. You know what, he was going right back up to that coffin to examine it. Hmmm.

"Place it beside him while he's sleeping. He'd have a nice surprise to wake up to." Jake was cruel when it came to practical jokes, okay. "Maybe I should grab a head as well while I'm here."

Make good decisions, Jake. Make good decisions.

"Too bad we don't still have those makeup kits. I think false eyelashes'd really add that special extra touch." Heiji wasn't... cruel when it came to practical jokes, but lbr Alfendi probably deserved it. And it would be a reminder of the wonderful time they spent with Heiji making Alfendi look like a 50 year old office lady.

He gave a small chuckle at that, the thought of putting fake eyelashes on this head, before making bad life decisions.

He picked up his bag of coins, keeping them with him, and then the cellphone. "Here, catch," he warned before tossing it towards Heiji to grab. This surely wasn't going to awaken the other robots, no sirree.

Heiji flipped the phone open, but sadly it would not turn on. It was basically a brick, whoo yeah awesome.

There was a muffled sound from inside one of the coffins. Suddenly, a robotic hand burst through the lid of the coffin containing it and began to flex its fingers. Splinters flew everywhere.

/SCARE CHORD

One by one, each coffin followed suit and a few that managed to break off enough of the lids sat up, all staring at the apparent thieves.

"... You'd got to be kidding me." Were they in some horror game or something? Like what was this? "Fight or flight?"

"Forget it," said Heiji, "I ain't fightin' these guys over a cell phone that doesn't work."

Solving puzzles, getting dumped in icewater, running from Indiana Jones boulders, that Heiji could deal with. But fighting robots over a broken cell phone, that was where he DREW THE LINE. He tossed it at the nearest robot; it made a little bopping noise as it bounced off the robot's sternum and dropped back into the coffin.

Throwing the phone was a good choice, since the robots wouldn't go after them once they had their preeeeecious things back. However, they didn't stop rising from the dead and start walking/crawling very slowly towards. Why? Because Jake didn't throw his bag of coins to them. Hmmm...

Just going to put this bag in his pocket and get ready to either beat up some robots or just leave the room. Do not even try to judge him.

"Seriously?" Heiji asked, making a face. He readied his shovel anyway, though. Just in case Jake couldn't suplex like five robots at once.

Just give them back the coins, Jake...

CALHOUN HOUR - ESCAPE

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