vivarium | CALHOUN HOUR

When characters begin to wake up, instead of finding themselves in the usual warehouse, they will instead find themselves in an a very unfamiliar area. Maybe they'll wake up alone, or maybe they'll wake up with someone else. Either way, the biggest point is that they're in God-knows-where and it's the start of a new Calhoun Hour.

Within seconds later, a familiar voice booms throughout the loud speakers.

"Ahem, testing, testing! Hello, can you all hear me?"

It's, without a doubt, your favourite robotic mouse, Calhoun. As usual, he sounds a cheery as ever.

"Wow, isn't this familiar? It's almost like the first time we've met, you know. Test subject in a new location, maybe alone or maybe with someone else, my charming voice rings throughout the room, trying to drown you all in an elevator. Good times!"

"Well, anyway, welcome to your new Calhoun Hour! You can see that I've taken the liberty to move you all to a more suitable location. You may not know it, with how small your brains are, but you're all stuck in a maze! I've had my fair share of running around in mazes, you know, being a mouse and all, so I want to return to favour to you humans! So, you know the drill: explore, look around, try to escape, blah blah blah, I don't need to explain all this! Just get to it! Who knows, maybe the exit here is an exit out to the real world. I might be generous like that, if you manage to find it. If not, well, I guess you can all starve here!"

He snickers, then pauses. Suddenly, a loud gunshot-like sound rings throughout the speakers, and Calhoun screams again.

"Let's get started!"

BASIC INFO ✖ ESCAPE ✖ POST-EVENT MINGLE ✖ TURN-IN

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He won't speed up the process in the slightest when Ema appears to have eaten without any problems. That just means that nacho and that cheese happened to be safe.

So far so good...]

[she'll just have to try another one. I mean, real jalapenos. Or at least what looks and smells like them. Who knows when this opportunity could happen again. It would be a sin not to keep eating.]

Hey, there's juice, too, want some?

[He just shakes his head, presumably too occupied with slowly eating as he is. It isn't until he's swallowed that he'll actually reply:]

Be careful with it.

What, is it going to explode?

[she takes another few chips--they're still hot, how does that even work--stuffing them into her face like a good japanifornian instead of nibbling like a mouse.]

I think it's all a scam, these are actually perfectly safe...

It would be nice if they were.

[It's completely sincere, too. He's just extremely wary after his last adventure in warehouse food. Fool me once and all that.

He's made it through this much of the yakisoba without any ill effects, so... He'll just keep slowly eating away at it, bit by bit. It's probably helpful he's not really the type to have a big appetite anyway.]

Seems like it so far. You should take the chance to get some protein while you can.

[honestly ema has been in the 'shame on me' part for so long she has more than run out of it. but there are plenty of different foods to eat, so why not try a little of everything? It was probably worth the slightly stabbing pain to get to eat something you actually needed to chew. ...She winces, slowing down.]

[Which he notices.]

Are you alright?

...Fine. Just...no need to hurry, right? Eating too fast'll make you sick.

...You just ate something bad, didn't you?

[He warned you Ema...]

How are you feeling?

Didn't I just say fine? It'll pass.

[she certainly hopes it will, anyway. It's not like she couldn't get up and do something if she needed to but sitting and gritting her teeth is just easier right now.]

[...Yeah, that pretty much settles it. Appetite gone, he leaves the yakisoba unfinished.]

Are you just going to wait it out, then?

Not really brimming with other options.

[she reaches for a nearby glass and hesitates...just one whiff makes her feel woozy, so let's just put that back down and take some water from her bag instead. ]

Come on.

I have extra water if you need it.

[He's not about to ditch her while she's sick...]

It's okay. At least it wasn't Soporil, I guess. Let's get out of here.

[luckily(?) ema is accustomed to wandering around while in considerable pain so woo]

Are you sure that's a good idea? Some of the other rooms have traps...

[she shrugs, shoulders a little stiff]

You have any better options? I mean, I guess I could just sit around and eat all the rest of this stuff, things can't get worse.

[...famous last words]

Or you could sit and stop eating things that might make it worse.

You're not my real dad. I don't have to do what you say.

[she says, doing what he says. she curls up in the chair, actually looking less childish and sulky and more generally miserable]

...You don't have to stick around. Just tell me the next room doesn't involve any pit traps or Calhoun paraphernalia is all I ask.

I wasn't trying to be.

[But at least she's taking his advice. That's a step in the right direction.]

...You found a pit trap in here?

[jumping on the chance to talk about things other than her personal lack of foresight (even though it doesn't really get that far away from the topic after all)]

There's a room with a glass floor, that broke so you fell into water. There's a room full of spiders, that one was real fun. And there's a room where if you aren't a total self-centered jerk you end up drowning in a pit of Calhoun.

[shudders at that one]

[Oh.

Those sound like... fun.]

Heiji and I found the room with all the Calhoun... stuff. [Yeah. Let's just leave it at that.] We didn't investigate it very closely.

Definitely for the best. Where did that stuff even come from...

...That's a good question. Someone had to make it...

[But who in their right minds would?]

Maybe that's what happened to everyone who Zero takes away. They're forced into making Calhoun crap...

It's almost like slave-labor...

[...Is he actually joking? Goodness.]

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