vivarium | open post etc

[In the time before the puzzle room goes up and after the happy friendship party that was the last Calhoun (Zero?) Hour feel free to use this post for whatever you want. Top levels, threads with dudes, whatever, live life freely.]

[If you're interested in harassing Hershel here's what he'll be doing:

a) Asking people if they want laundry done. Not unmentionables, he's not some sort of cad here, but he's got shit all to do, can't sleep and might as well do something useful, right? Right. Feel free to find him near the stream, trying not to nod off since getting shocked in the water probably wasn't the best idea in the world. Possibly. Or trying to mend tears or something and making a mess of it. He'll never be a proper old maid at this rate.

b) Trying to play videogames maybe? And by 'play' I mean 'make faces at as they get steadily worse.' He might try a movie or two in the vain hope something will be manageable to watch but yeah. Yeah. Basically any late night lounge activity, assuming no one's already asleep in there, have at.

c) These are hard to think of, I guess trying to fencing practice in the gym with his shiny new foil, curtesy of Mr. Sasuke Sagami. Try not to get accidentally jabbed by a giant needle with a blunt bit on the end, it probably sucks.

Or whatever, do whatever you'd like. He'll basically be wandering around aimlessly mostly anyway, being completely useless to everyone because he's tired.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Clive just so happens to be awake by chance when he sees Alfendi being taken away by Calhoun in a stretcher like so many others have been. At least he got to give Alfendi his flower crown earlier so he's going out in style, but it was a truly heartbreaking sight to behold. Clive really liked Alfendi a lot and was hoping that he would come back to them like he did last time. Part of him had a feeling that this was coming, but it didn't make losing another good friend any less devastating. He told Alfendi that he would take his picture once he was all better, but clearly that day was never coming now.

It also doesn't help that Clive was already in a very negative mood due to dwelling on the memory that he received yesterday for winning that stupid "game," so this turn of events is enough to make him just double over in his chair and cry for a good few minutes before he figures he should take this somewhere a little less out in the open. With tears still running down his cheeks, he makes his way up to the garden so he can just curl up in a corner or something, but as soon as he enters he sees Hershel sitting in the grass, awake and looking equally if not even more devastated about this situation.

If it had been anyone else sitting there, Clive would have turned around and fled back to the first floor even though it likely would have been a futile effort because of this damn squeaky chair. But Hershel is the one person that he doesn't mind witnessing his crying mess of a self right now, so he just squeaks right on over to him, not that Clive can hear because surprise surprise he's still deaf. Then he carefully removes himself from his chair and plops down in the grass next to Hershel. Without any warning whatsoever, he basically snuggles right on up to Hershel, wrapping his arms around him from the side and leaning against him and everything. He doesn't plan on moving anytime soon, either, unless Hershel is clearly uncomfortable with this.]

[Hershel probably didn't see Alfendi leave, but it didn't take long to figure out he was gone given how many times Hershel checked up on him throughout the day. Harassing Zero about it likely got him all the answers he needed on that front, and all he could really think to say was 'oh.'

Maybe it was horrible of him to push it aside and go on with his day but that's what he did. He didn't think about it, he checked on everyone, he did all the little things he did daily that were now a weird but sometimes comforting routine. He remembered once Kuzuryuu remarked on how strange it was no one really talked about the people how were taken away, and Hershel hadn't known how to tell him it was because facing the fact they were all probably dead was just too much on top of everything else. It was easier to live on hope that maybe one day they'd be back out of the blue, to keep moving forward and silently pretend that one aspect of this would be alright.

It was sometime in the middle of doing his little routine that he couldn't help but stop long enough to consider it. He was sitting in the garden, too exhausted at the moment to keep his emotions in better check, and it hit him that maybe Alfendi leaving was his fault, because he had gotten hurt in the maze for Hershel and never really recovered. It struck him he never got a real memory back about Alfendi, that when he did Alfendi wouldn't be around for him to tell him, that it was entirely possible he'd be going home to his family to tell them that they had lost someone in this mess afterall.

More than anything he just missed having Alfendi around, he was- when he was acting normally- a bright, bizarre spot in this dreary place. All his nonsense was endearing to Hershel, it made things feel... better, somehow. He swallowed at a lump in his throat as he thought of it, too distracted to really notice Clive coming in. When the squeaking finally caught his attention he didn't glance to it but away, trying to clear his expression somewhat. No use bringing Clive down when he had enough on his plate, he was just... tired. That was all.

But then Clive was sitting beside him, leaning against him, and he turned to stare a moment before it clicked. The look on Clive's face gave it away well enough, and after a moment he felt his shoulders slumping because there was no reason to pretend everything was just fine right now. Hershel swallowed at that pesky lump again before putting an arm around Clive, his other gripping the grass a little too hard. No use making stupid comments Clive probably couldn't even hear, so instead he just quietly stayed there for as long as Clive was willing to spend.]

[Feeling Hershel's arm around him somehow manages to trigger even more tears, so Clive just buries half of his face into Hershel's shoulder and tightens his grip around the younger boy as the waterworks continue, his own shoulders shaking as he makes conscious efforts not to sob too loudly. He doesn't know how successful he actually is, but Clive is a pretty quiet crier by nature anyway so all that really comes out are the occasional hiccup-like noises and sniffles.

After what feels like an eternity but is really about 20 or so minutes later, it seems that his tear ducts are finally dried up. Clive stays still for a few moments just to make sure that it's really over, then while keeping most of his weight against Hershel's side, he unwraps his arms in order to grab his journal and pen from his bag nearby. He flips the journal open to the next blank page and has to blink a few times to be able to see the page clearly. Then, he writes a single word on the top line, in handwriting that is a little less neat than usual.]

Sorry

[He puts the journal and pen down in front of Hershel for him to see and write a reply if he wants to. Then after briefly glancing at the wet spot on Hershel's shoulder where Clive had been crying, he looks away as he wipes his cheeks with his sleeve because god, his face probably looks super gross right now.]

[Hershel let go of the grass long enough to reach over and gently pat Clive's arm, the side of his head, finding it hard to keep swallowing down the stubborn lump in his throat. He thought for a moment what Alfendi would say if he heard Hershel was about to cry over him, of all things, and the disgusted look he imagined forced a choked sort of laugh out of him before he pushed it back down.

He didn't make much of a sound after that, stirring from his thoughts only when Clive started moving. He stares a moment, realizing in a weird sort of delay that he wanted to communicate with Hershel. That communication makes him stare for a moment more before he hastily took the pen.]

No, thank you. [He stares at his own words for a long moment before blinking rapidly. It takes him a moment to continue.] For caring about him.

open post etc

i for it's time to fucking cuddle you piece of shit

excellent excellent also sorry this got so long shit...

you should be sorry that this tag almost made me cry in public

LMFAO god these sadsacks are killing me